The Athlete’s Mindset

2025.11 - I saw TPM years my senior quit under pressure. I saw many thrive under it. What separates them is not skill alone, but a unique mindset, one that you must learn to grow your TPM career.

I was 24 when I joined Apple as an Engineering Program Manager. For a kid who grew up in the age of the smartphone revolution, it felt like a dream come true to join the iPhone team.

I suddenly found myself surrounded by legends with MBAs from Haas, undergrads from Stanford, folks who had worked at Amazon, Adobe, and veterans who had been at Apple since the ’80s. It felt like I’d been invited into a sacred guild where the bar was impossibly high and the expectations even higher. These people were operating on a completely different level.

Early on, I chalked up some events to anomalies. A senior EPM with over a decade of experience quit just a few months in. “Too fast-paced,” they said. “Overwhelming.”

What? But, you had a decade of experience at name brand tech companies.

I saw this pattern enough times in the coming years to realize it wasn’t an anomaly—it was a signal. The role of a TPM demands a kind of psychological and emotional endurance that most of us aren’t prepared for when we start or aware of.

Last week, I wrote about how TPM are the lightening rod of all anxiety within a program. There is an inherent whiplash to the role—context-switching, juggling multiple playbooks, dealing with difficult personalities, and leading through ambiguity. It’s a job that applies a steady, invisible pressure, one you don’t fully appreciate when you’re new and hungry.

At first, I believed that experience alone was supposed to carry you through. The more seasoned I became, the better I’d handle the complexity, right? After all, my senior peers were managing monstrous programs and thriving.

But, experience wasn’t the only thing holding them up. It took many years to appreciate this but what truly kept them going was something deeper, quieter— they had The Athlete’s Mindset.

This mindset isn’t about physical strength. It’s about mental conditioning—just like an elite athlete who trains not only the body but also the mind to handle pressure, failure, fatigue, and self-doubt.

Here’s the good news: this mindset can be taught, and it can be learned. Just like any other skill in our TPM toolkit.

If I were to give you one advice on progressing your career as a TPM, I’d suggest not skipping time building this inner foundation. Because the technical and operational knowledge will come with time. But the mental game? That’s the edge. That takes time and it is not linear or obvious.

Here’s what I’ve learned about what defines the TPM version of the athlete’s mindset—and how to cultivate each part of it:

1. Resilience

What it looks like:

Great TPMs stay calm under pressure. When projects go sideways or teams spiral, they’re the steady hand in the room. They recover quickly from setbacks and don’t internalize failure as personal.

How to develop it:

• Write a regular journal on the events and key moments in the day especially involving you.

• Learn to separate your identity from outcomes. This will be hard but don’t take everything personal.

• Take on hard projects where failure is highly possible.

• When shit hits the fan, learn to consciously be the stabilizer force. Be the calm one in the room.

2. Discipline

What it looks like:

They run mental checklists, lean on process when needed, and know when to break away from it. They build systems that help them function at a high level without reinventing the wheel.

How to develop it:

• Develop your own personal playbook: risk logs, meeting templates, escalation guides. This is important because it becomes “your style” of TPMing.

• Never over commit or overload your plate.

• Develop the skill to say “no” more than focusing on saying “yes”.

• Every program I run, I always build a “program dashboard” that gives me the full 10,000ft visibility to spot problems. When you see things coming, you learn to be prepared.

3. Growth Mindset

What it looks like:

They make mistakes in pursuit of difficult challenges—and they don’t make the same mistake twice. They’re constantly watching, learning, adapting, and seeking feedback.

How to develop it:

• Ask for feedback regularly from engineers and PMs, not just your managers.

• Conduct postmortems not just for programs, but for yourself.

• Read biographies or listen to interviews of leaders outside your field to see how they overcame adversity.

• Pick one new skill to stretch yourself every quarter—tech, soft skills, anything.

4. Ability to Thrive in Chaos

What it looks like:

They operate in ambiguity, bring structure to disorder, and move fluidly between leadership and support. They understand when to push and when to pause.

How to develop it:

• Take on early-stage programs where nothing is defined.

• Shadow someone who leads large, ambiguous efforts.

• Build an observation eye - you can learn MUCH be seeing how A+ TPM operate.

• Use the “First Principles” method to define what’s truly essential when chaos hits. Deal in facts.

• Run scenarios in your mind or with your team ahead of key events, milestones, and exec reviews. Every great athlete visualizes a game before it begins.

5. Self-Reflection

What it looks like:

They’re constantly evaluating their own decisions, meetings, and communications. They look back at programs not just for lessons, but for insights into their own habits.

How to develop it:

• Journaling is your best friend.

• At the end of each major milestone, write a “what I learned” note to yourself.

• Ask a trusted peer to review your leadership on a recent project; someone not your manager.

• Revisit your old project plans—look for your own blind spots and growth areas.

6. Humility

What it looks like:

They aren’t afraid to say “I don’t know” or “Can you help me?” They understand that vulnerability earns trust and that asking for help isn’t weakness—it’s wisdom.

How to develop it:

• Practice asking questions. We don’t need to speak at every meeting but we mustn’t be too silent to be absent.

• Acknowledge team contributions publicly.

• Keep a “brag doc” not just of your wins but of the people who made those wins possible.

• Remind yourself: you’re here to serve the team, not to be the smartest in the room.

• Never be afraid to learn from peers your junior. (Lately, I have learned my new skills from my Jr.)

• Don’t be afraid to say “I am drowning. Help!”. I see this happen too often and group this under the obvious but not obvious category.

This is by know means a definitive list. There is much more that can be done and built. You must what you can to seek it out and add to this list. I am getting you started on it.

Final Words

As you move forward in your TPM career, don’t just level up on tools, frameworks, and domain expertise. Build the mindset. Train like an athlete. Strengthen the muscle that helps you bounce back, stay clear-headed, and lead others through the fire.

Because when the pressure comes—and it will—it’s not the playbook that saves you.

It’s who you’ve become under pressure.

Until next time!

-Aadil